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By Susan Kramer
Ma had a
special lesson on forgiveness to share with the twins, and decided that a
perfect time would be when she usually read them a bedtime story. It was about
both learning how to forgive others, and how to forgive ourselves when we make mistakes, or hurt someone's
feelings.
That
evening after Anneke and Hans were settled down, Ma called them over to sit
next to her on the couch, and she began to read her highlighted excerpts,
"Jan was on the school playground and fell over a wagon that a classmate
left on the running track." Ma continues, "It is better for Jan to
forgive his classmate's forgetfulness, than to hold a grudge, and lose out on
their friendship for a little while, or in the long run."
And
reading further, "Forgiving is both giving pardon and receiving pardon.
These are skills that preserve peace and harmony."
Ma then
set the book aside and told the twins that forgiving ourselves for not being
perfect is an important part of growing up to be responsible citizens, in
friendships and at work.
She said,
"All through our lives we need to forgive ourselves for our errors in
judgement, so we can go right on and try other ways of proceeding, and not get
stuck in a groove of remorse."
Ma
reminded the twins that saying "I'm sorry" is the way most of us know
to ask for forgiveness, especially when we've hurt someone's feelings or
accidentally broken another's toy.
Ma said,
"It feels better to say the words and preserve the friendship than try to
hide from what we've done. We forgive ourselves for our mistakes by changing
our behavior in the future, and by realizing everyone makes mistakes and it
does not mean we are bad."
After listening
to Ma talk about forgiveness, and then each dunking bites of a gingerbread
cookie in milk, Anneke and Hans brushed their teeth and slowly trudged up the
stairs to bed. Along the way they paused and reflected to each other that sure
enough, forgiveness was a skill they wanted to learn so it would become a
habit.
With that
in mind, they decided to practice right then – Anneke's bedroom was on the
second floor and Hans' room was up a story under the eaves.
As Anneke
went into her room she turned out the hall light, leaving Hans in the dark.
Then after a couple of seconds, she turned it back on calling up to Hans that
she was sorry to leave him in the dark while climbing the stairs.
He shouted back to her that he
forgave her, and they both went into their rooms smiling, feeling like they had
just learned a little bit about forgiveness firsthand.
(Key
points: forgiving others; forgiving one's self)
This
story excerpted from the book Anneke and
Hans in 30 Tales of Adventure and Virtue http://www.susankramer.com/annekeandhans.html
Anneke and Hans Learn About Forgiveness and artwork copyright © 2018-2019 Susan
Helene Kramer |
Anneke and Hans
in 30 Tales of Adventure and Virtue
http://www.susankramer.com/annekeandhans.html
A meditation and yoga practitioner since 1976, Susan
Kramer writes on practical spirituality, family and social issues, and dance.
Her instructional books are listed at her web site –
http://www.susankramer.com/books.html
Email: susan@susankramer.com